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Today |
.I'm what you might call a "Non-dancer." I will not dance under almost any circumstances. Someone could be holding a gun to my Mom's head threatening blow off her skull cap if I didn’t Cha-Cha my sweet little ass off. Sorry, Mom. Say hi to Grandpa. Heh, I kid … I love you Mom! Thanks for the tuition payments! My no-dancing policy runs contradictory to my girlfriend's policy, which is pro-dance in nature. Now, she'll tell you that when we first met in London I was all about dancing. This isn't exactly true. Yes, I did do some dancing while I was overseas, but I had my reasons. One, I was trying to gain the good favor of said girlfriend. Unfortunately, as any self-respecting male will tell you, at least some dancing is required during the courting phase of a relationship. Another reason for the dancing stint … I'm in the fucking clubbing capital of the world. At the typical London club there are two activities you can occupy yourself with. You can dance, or you can drink. If possible, I choose the latter in almost any club situation. However, when a weak-assed Vodka Red Bull costs, on average, ten American dollars, I'm forced to take my chances on the dance floor. I know what you're saying. "Oh, I bet he's a shitty dancer. I bet he can't jig his way out of a wet paper bag!!" On the contrary, I'm a great dancer. AND … I'm a better dancer when I'm sloshed… I just don't like dancing. Deal with it.
It's insane, this guys taint - 2004-12-07 |